The most important question to me...

The closer we have gotten to the one year anniversary of the tragic events of 4-16-07, the more I have thought about what it means to me. First, since that time, my wife and I have had a baby - a little girl - and she is such a joy. From time to time I get really sad in thinking about what it must have been like to have been a father of one of those young ladies murdered last year. I am brought to tears every time I think of what I would do if someone told me that my little girl wasn't coming home any more. The other thing that lingers - and will stay with me all my life - is the heroism of Dr. Liviu Librescu. In his life, he was an accomplished scholar - I hope to live up to what I'm sure would be his expectations of an academic.

But it is his death that speaks to me most strongly. At one point, I left a paper near his memorial stone (it was the day the Yankees visited), on which I wrote (as I recall), "There are many questions from 4-16-07; many remain unanswered. To me, only one matters, "Would I stand in front of that door?" I signed it "Educators everywhere." I have not idea how long it was there - or even if any of the visitors saw it. But, as a teacher - it is the one burning question that overrides all other debates. WOULD I STAND IN FRONT OF THE DOOR? Dr. Librescu laid down his life for his students. This man, this scholar, father, husband, grandfather, survivor - he did the right thing. Would I? I hope I would - I hope I'd have his strength.

In John Donne's famous Meditation XVII (http://www.readprint.com/work-519/John-Donne), he talks about how that each person, while he or she is alive, has "gold" that cannot be spent, "Tribulation is treasure in the nature of it, but it is not current money in the use of it..." When we learn of a man's death(the bell that tolls), the passing takes out that person's gold puts into a useful form for us, the living. Dr. Librescu's action that day is my gold, and I will treasure it forever. Thank you so much sir, for your commitment to your students.

When I was talking to the young people at Torgersen Hall a couple of weeks ago, I looked at their faces and I felt so strongly why it is I am in education, and why I love teaching and learning - it is the because of the bright young students in our classroom. They are worth our investment.

Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund update: First $1,000 raised!!

I posted the following "press release" to the SLED Picayune blog and to the SLED listserv yesterday:

"In an effort to provide Second Life residents with a means of supporting the "Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund," SL resident, a RL Virginia Tech faculty member, Milosun Czervik (Ross Perkins) initiated an in-world fundraising campaign on April 19th. Hundreds of SL residents have been donating funds via donation boxes and vendors, where they can receive a Hokies t-shirt to wear on their avatar.

After a silent auction, held this past week on EduIsland (see the Chronicle of Higher Education web report), the goal of raising L$300,000 has been reached. The funds have been converted to US dollars via LindeX, yielding $1,085 US.Once the money has been deposited to a PayPal account and can be accessed, Perkins will write a check for the full amount to the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund. Next up? Perkins plans to initiate a new campaign to raise more funds for the Memorial Fund and scholarships that have been started in memory of the victims of the April 16 tragedy."

For this blog, I want to personally thank a number of volunteers who helped make the VT Memorial and the HSMF fundraiser possible (this list will grow as I remember/find more names!)

Lorelei Junot, Abbey Zenith, Katrina Sol, Marston Davids, Penelope Ghia, Perefim Cao, Eloise Pasteur, Dedric Mauriac, Dagmar Kojishi, Ann Enigma, ZeroOne Paz, DianaPrince Carter, Eddie Hagoromo, Robin Linden...

VT Memorial Digital Archive

A digital library that captures stories and images about the tragedy at Virginia Tech on 16-APR-07.

Official VT Memorial now established

After a couple of weeks of temporary locations, I'm happy to report that there is now an official memorial spot in Second Life to remember the victims of the Virginia Tech shootings (16-APR-07). Marston Davids and Penelope Ghia have been exceptionally dedicated to making this site happen. Marston, in particular, has shown his building skills, and has created a place that is indeed respectful and beautiful. He even textured part of the parcel to resemble at VT, and placed 33 trees on it, making for a very somber park in which to walk or sit. Since the memorial is now on privately held land, the griefer incidents have not been a real issue.

To see more photos from the memorial on Marston West, see my flickr.com site: http://tinyurl.com/26yzsl

Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund: The initial goal has nearly been met! Only about L$14,000 left to go!!

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Blog entries about the memorial(s): I recently did a Google search on VT memorials in Second Life, and entries about it seem to be popping up all over, though most of what I have seen is merely a recasting of the original MTV article. Some of the blogs have comments about the memorial, not all of which are positive. I wonder if these same people who don't see a role for a VT Memorial in SL also criticize memorial websites that have gone up? My guess is that the critics have not yet accepted the 3D look of the web. I can understand the perception that the "game-like" appearance of SL might seem trite (my very first concern), but I think the environment we've created there is actually quite respectful. I will not be refuting the negative comments on the blogs. Here are a couple of memorial websites, though I'm sure there are many more:

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1) http://rosa.hosting.vt.edu/index.php/memorial/

2) http://virginiatechtribute.blogspot.com/

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I recently met a VCU professor in-world ("Ignatius Onomatopoeia") who blogs for the Richmond Times-Dispatch. His article about the fundraising efforts are found at: http://slbeat.mytimesdispatch.com/

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The SLURL for the VT Memorial site:

http://slurl.com/secondlife/Marston%20West/129/121/25

Other VT Memorial Sites (and fundraiser update)

There are two other VT Memorials in Second Life that I have not mentioned yet. One was set up by Perefim Cao, who created the original memorial statue that was placed on Info Island (see on back of platform in the picture below, and referred to in an earlier blog posting).

The other was set up by VooDoo Zheng at his sim, Shinning Light. I am a bit disturbed by the "graveyard" look of this memorial, but VZ has done a lot of work and I appreciate his efforts to memorialize the victims. There is even a book of the victims' faces, with a brief bio about them.






HSMF Update: To date, approximately L$270,000 has been raised for the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund! This is very close to the goal of L$300,000. Depending on how long it takes to reach that goal, another goal may well be set! The generosity of SL residents never ceases to amaze me. I have heard that there has been some controversy about VT memorial fundraising in SL; I am glad people are asking questions. I am not sure what Linden Labs can do, but it would be great if I could get a LL employee to verify that what I'm reporting is the actual amount. The money raised to date is not much compared to the private and corporate gifts rolling into VT on a daily basis (one of our former football players, now with the Browns, donated $50,000 - which is a lot given that he makes the league's minimum of $250K per year), but it will be a showing of support that is the first of its kind at Virginia Tech!


VT Memorial on Info Island Update: Abbey Zenith has requested that the memorial be moved from its current site. I will likely relocate the pictures/wall to the ICT Library location, but I'm not sure of the logistics quite yet. This actually coincides with the movement of the RL memorials - many of which were taken off the drillfield yesterday and placed inside, due to inclement weather. The use of that location for the past week has been imporant and I personally thank Katrina Sol and Abbey Zenith for their help in that effort.


VT Memorial on Linden Land (Fame) Update: Griefers have continued to be a real problem on the parcel. This is very unfortunate, but the irony is that had it not been for their idiocy, I would not have met with some of the Linden Lab employees who have helped clean up messes, and I would not have met some SL private citizens who keep a vigilant watch over the place. Among these are folks who make up part of the Justice League of Second Life. This may sound odd, but their activity has helped get griefers banned and have ensured that stupid objects do not get left all over the place. I have been very impressed with their dedication. However, it has been suggested that since the location is near a sandbox (griefer training grounds, it seems), that perhaps it should be moved to a private sim. I had the opportunity to talk with a man who is willing to donate a sim for the purpose of having the memorial. This is a tremendous display of generosity that, again, I would not have seen had it not been for the griefers' activities. So, though the intent of the Patriotic Nigras or /b/tards (whoever they are - the faceless, nameless cowards) was to disrupt, destroy, and harass, they actually helped me gain friendships and partnerships with legions of civil, sympatheic, and generous SL residents.

VT Memorial on Linden Land

After the parcel on Info Island was full of memorial objects left by visitors, Robin Linden made a parcel of land available on a sim managed by Linden Lab. The photo above is an overview of the memorial: in the center is the landing spot, with a sign the reads "Remembering those we lost." To the left are large images of the VT student newspaper, The Collegiate Times from the week of 4/16. On the walls are large posters of the victims, along with links to their biographies as published on the Roanoke Times website. More photos of the memorial are located on my Flickr site.

Over the past few days, I have had a good deal of internal debate & consternation about putting up any sign for Mr. Cho. I tried to do this once, and took it down again because I was too angry. I'm still angry with him - and always will be - for what he did to 32 wonderful people, but I was beginning to think something was needed. My decision to put up a panel (pictured below) was not a response to the griefers (vandals), many of whom stood on the false claim that they would continue to attack if no picture of Cho was included. In fact, I was strongly resisting any attempt of any SL resident to put up his picture solely for the reason - for two reasons (at least). First, it looked like capitulation to the idiots who were attacking the parcel/sim. Second, Cho had his fame all over the world with his videos and pictures. The "Question Mark Kid" became an exclamation point over and over again. The victims, in my mind, did not get nearly the acclaim they deserve. I am glad to see that they made the cover of Time magazine.

On Friday evening, I had a conversation with two SL residents who were concerned about a lack of any sense of sorrow for Mr. Cho. They had erected a poster of him, which I promptly covered up with a large black box. This of course led to a discussion! The conversation got me to think again about a situation that happened to a colleague just a few years ago. Let me recount briefly...

A couple of years ago, one of professors - a respected scholar and a great guy - had a son (in his 20's) who had some substance abuse problems, etc. Early one morning, he was on the run from having stolen cigarettes (or attempting to do so) from a small convenience store. When a police officer responded, the professor's son beat him, pulled him from his car, and shot him to death. Within a few moments, the young man was shot and killed by police who responded to the scene. The tragedy shocked the community - all felt a deep sense of loss for the slain officer and his widow and young daughter. Nearly all felt anger and hatred toward the young man who killed him - knowing full well that if he had not been killed, Virginia's capital punishment clause would certainly have been applied. But for those of us who knew, worked with, and loved the professor, we grieved for both families, but especially for our colleague and his wife - the father and mother of son who perpetrated such violence. The tragedy ripped aparts lives of the victimizer's family and the victim's family. Ever since that time, I have been more sympathetic towards the families of criminals, and I have tried to understand the person behind the depravity or evil. I'm human - this does not always come quickly or easily. In the case of Mr. Cho, I cannot find it in me to post his picture. Instead, I wrote created the following sign for the memorial:

"The weak can never forgive.

Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."

-Gandhi

In memory of...
Not who he became, but who he
was beneath the hate and rage.
The peace his family knew
before April 16, 2007.
The friendless and unloved,
who felt dead before they died.
Victims, whoever they are.

Each person has to grieve in his/her own way and come to an understanding on his/her own about how - and who - to remember from this tragedy. On Virginia Tech's drillfield, there are 33 "Hokie Stones" that surround the review stand that sits just below Burruss Hall (the main administration building at VT). Whoever put it there felt compelled to remember Cho's humanity before I was convinced it was necessary. Today, during the ceremony to remember the victims, only 32 balloons were released - a strong message that this community is focused - not incorrectly in my estimation - on the innocent victims alone.

The Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund

I wanted to create a separate entry about my efforts in SL to raise money for the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund (HSMF).

Some months ago - maybe as long ago as last April - I created a Virginia Tech t-shirt that my avatar could wear in SL. Those who see me regularly "know" it's Milo because of my maroon and orange shirt - with "Virginia Tech" and "VT" on the front, and our mascot, the Hokie Bird, on the back. I sometimes wear other shirts or costumes - but the VT gear and black pants are my normal attire. Since I do not have official licensing permission from the university, I never sold the shirts - just gave them away to other Tech faculty or students working/playing in-world. Monday's event changed everything - and when it was declared on Wednesday of last week that Friday, April 20 would be "Hokie Hope" day... wear people across the nation were encouraged to wear orange and maroon (specifically, burnt orange and Chicago maroon), I knew I had to act quickly. I immediately thought that with the tools I had, I could turn this into a fund-raising opportunity for the HSMF.

So, from late Wednesday to early Thursday morning (2 am EST), I worked to set up a vendor (created/scripted by SL's Eloise Pasteur) that allows visitors to donate to the HSMF. They could choose from six different amounts - ranging from $1 US (approx. L$300) to $100 US (approx. L$30,000). For *any* donation amount, one receives the VT t-shirt I created for SL. I set up two vendors at the Info Island memorial site, and then another on the plot donated by Linden Lab. Two more vendors (including one with a white VT shirt) is at the "Illusions Night Club" in SL, run by an avatar whose RL dad is a Virginia Tech alumnus. There is also a vendor at the ICT Library (of course).

At the suggestion of a visitor to the memorial on Thursday, I added "open-ended" donation boxes, so that one could add any amount large or small. These co-exist with the shirt vendors. My goal is to get as many vendors and donations boxes in-world as possible, to see what happens over the next 30 days. I am also trying to work with others to coordinate fund-raising efforts.

As I write this, the shirt vendors and donation boxes have taken in nearly $420 US, or almost 1/2 the target amount of $1,000 US!! I am going to work with Linden Lab (or hope to) on a way to convert the funds from Linden dollars to real money without incuring a fee.

Thank you, Jeremy & SJSU

The machinima video, created by Jeremy Kemp of San Jose State University, shows the SL representation of the RL support for Virginia Tech. Seeing things like this is a great reminder of the solidarity of students and faculty no matter their location.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhW2bzwSVn4

Friday's notes...

Some very nice blog entries about the VT memorials in Second Life can be found on the PacRim Exchange blog. The provide history of the memorial, showing how it has grown. I was struck today how the RL memorials on the Drillfield keep on growing - and how there is almost no difference between the virtual and real locations with regard to sentiment for the victims, survivors, and those impacted.

April 16th: Virginia Tech Memorial on Main Grid
April 17th: Another visit to the Memorial
April 18th: Virginia Tech Memorial - Day Three
April 19th: Official Memorial Established - Land Donated by Linden Lab

For the record, just because it's on Linden Lab-owned land, I don't think this is the "official" site. The article is good, but I take issue with the assertion. On and around the Drillfield on campus, there are a few memorial sites - none of which is "official," even though one sits right in front of the main administration building, Burrus Hall.

The best news of the day is that, thus far, the donation boxes and "Donate to get a VT T-shirt" vendors in Second Life have brought in almost $400!! All the money will be donated to the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund. The goal is $1,000... so we're getting there!

The worst news to report from the memorials is the presence of griefers and frauds - and I am not talking about the crush of RL press coverage in Blacksburg (though, here again, the similarities are marked). There were at least three attacks at the SL memorial sites, one of which I saw just after it happened after a resident IM'd me about it. Thankfully, two alert Linden Lab employees cleaned things up quickly and prevented the idiot from doing it again (by not allowing him to sign up with an alternate account). Another person has started a fraudulent group in SL that seeks to raise money for victims families, and states that he lost his brother in the shootings (the name he provided is NOT that of any of the victims). What kind of depravity would make him do this? I reported him to LL for abuse. I sincerely hope his account gets banned and that someone (in RL) punches him in the brain. I kicked him out of the "Virginia Tech" group, which made him unleash profanities in our short IM conversation. This paragraph was more space than either happening deserves.

And from the "sloppy reporting" department, I offer the following two links to stories. Both essentially ripped-off the MTVnews.com story about the VT memorial. One of the two credits me for building a statue created by Perefim Cao (see yesterday's entry). The other mentions the MTVnews article, and then the author writes it like he is the one who covered it. I may not understand "new media journalism" as well as I could - but I know plagiarism and sloppiness from a mile away.

From mmorpg.qj.net (April 18):
Virginia Tech research associate builds memorial in Second Life

From 1up.com (April 18):
Memorial to Virginia Tech Goes Up in Second Life

I talked to a student journalism major from Indiana University SouthEast today who wanted to do a story related to SL for his class. His professor didn't think he had a story... I would say it was a compelling one. Hopefully, his prof gets unstuck from 20th century technology and Web 1.0. Good luck, Colin.

The VT Memorials in Second Life

Since Monday's events at Virginia Tech - which has been my home for the past eight years - all of us here have been trying to come to grips with the tragedy and what it means us personally and for the university that we love so much. Obviously, there are 33 families who are simply trying to make it to the next minute without crying or screaming.

On Monday afternoon (4-16-07), I was in Second Life for just a few minutes, wondering if I should make some kind of memorial... but I couldn't figure out what to do, I was totally drained, and I didn't know if it would be something that others would take seriously. After all, the real-life memorials here on campus are quite touching, and I wondered if some (or many) would object to the "video game" aspect of doing it. But then on Monday night - on their own initiative - some folks in Second Life (Abbey Zenith and Katrina Sol among them) got land on Info Island, not too far from the ICT Library. There, they set up a small memorial with two sculptures - one by Perefim Cao (top) and the other by Darrien Lightworker (below):


Soon, all around those sculptures, SL residents came to leave candles, flowers, teddy bears, and so on. All objects to show their sadness and support for the Virginia Tech community. On Tuesday afternoon, I decided to log-in to see the memorial, as I saw it described on the SLED listserv. I was very touched by what I saw. Evidently, there was a candelight vigil in SL the night before that I could not be part of, but I heard great things about it (except in the blog about it by Prokovy Neva, who wrote a verbose, rambling account that could have been simply left to a few words of regret and support). Prok did get one thing right - that when something like this happens, it's hard to think. Evidently, it impacted him/her too. At any rate, the pictures of the ceremony (by Katrina Sol) can be found on Flickr..

While standing at the VT Memorial site on Info Island, I decided that it needed a backdrop to give it some definition. Since I had "Hokie Stone" in my inventory, I thought a wall with the stone texture would be appropriate, and it would give the area a sense of Virginia Tech. As I put up the wall, I was IM'd by a reporter who was visiting from MTVNews. We chatted a bit, and he posted his story the next day, "Multiplayer: Virginia Tech Teacher Builds Memorial Wall in Virtual World." A different article about it appeared on Hamlet Au's New World Notes, "For Virginia."

I'm just thinking of this now, as I write, but one cannot even escape press in virtual environment! A lot of my colleagues and others I know at VT have been very discouraged with the press coverage (not the lack of it, but it's crushing presence... so much so that we can barely even grieve in peace). I know that they have a job to do, but the openly hostile and accustatory way in which our police and administration are being treated is patently unfair. Sure, questions must be raised, but on the first day? The first week? But in with 24-hour news cycles to fill, and commercials to sell, then one has to have a few different stories to keep people coming back. Every angle they take seems to want to put blame on someone - a group of someones (anyone but the gunman) - for the fact that 32 innocent people died. I have friends who can not even visit the memorials on the Drillfield for fear of having cameras in their face. Ok, enough about the press.

On Tuesday I was having a hard time dealing with the tragedy. Yes, I was terribly sad, but I found that as I tried to take in the enormity of this terrible thing, I could only do so by focusing on the lives of the victims. I cannot grieve in the abstract - I needed faces and stories. So, going back into SL, I began to build portraits of the victims - an idea given to me by one of the memorial visitors. I set to work on Tuesday, but only finished today, as getting all the names and photos took time.

On Wednesday, I worked on getting the bio links up and organizing the photos of those we lost. Then, in the late hours of the night - and into the morning - I had a flash of an idea: that I could set up a vendor to collect funds. Donors, in return, would get a Virginia Tech t-shirt. They could donate at six different levels. Putting all this together took about 2.5 hours, as I was working from home where my computer is slower than dirt.

Today (Thursday), Robin Linden donated land for a second memorial site on a piece of Linden land. There is a map/teleport to it from the Info Island location, but its grid coordinates are : Fame (192,85,29). I don't care for the sim name, but at least the title of the plot is "VT Memorial." At this location, I put up some 'Hokie Stone' walls and the pictures (larger than the ones at Info Island) of those we lost. Additionally, there are places for people to donate to the Hokie Spirit Memorial Fund. Unfortunately, there are already places and groups that appear to be fraudulently raising money or selling items related to the tragedy. As good as SL can be, there are also the idiots running around. I reported one case of abuse to Linden labs, and Robin tells me that they will get on it.

HSMF Update: As of 10:30 PM EST on 19-APR-07, more than $100 US has been raised for the fund! Tonight, I will try to think of ways to further promote it within SL. The goal is to raise $1,000 US ... the record in SL (by the American Cancer Society) is $60,000. It would be incredible to ever reach that!!

A lot of folks have thanked me for building the memorials, but as I close this entry, I want to make it very clear that I did not build them - only parts of them. Even ideas that I implemented sometime came from those who dropped by to visit. The first memorial, and subsequent statues, came from other SL residents who wanted to show solidarity with those of us at Virginia Tech. I cannot express how much it means to me to see such incredible support from the SL community. They have left hundreds (thousands?) of prim in the shape of gifts that show their concern.

I walked around campus today and saw the memorials and signs on the Drillfield, the flowers donated by various people that are filling the chapel, and the signs by university students across the nation. It is humbling to see the outpouring of support; to know how many people care about us. It is great that I can walk around RL and SL and feel such support.